I arrived in Vanuatu around 2:30 pm and was greeted at the airport by a string band. Sadly, Matt had not hired them, they were just there to welcome people to Vanuatu. He also didn’t make a sign for my arrival. I started to worry that 9 years in Vanuatu had changed my dear friend for the worse.

We hugged and instantly I knew all was right with the world. We headed for the parking lot and made it about 20 feet before I was shaking hands with people. I had no idea how many hands I would shake over the next 10 days. After a quick driving tour through town, we headed to Matt’s apartment so I could get settled, which after 4+ months in hostels meant dropping my bag and I was ready to go. I do not unpack if I don’t have to. I texted my mom a picture of us to prove I had made it and then we headed out.

I’m sure she loved it.

Matt still had to get a few things at the grocery store because up until I tagged him in my Facebook status that morning, he thought I wasn’t coming until the next day. He had been very ill for a few days before I showed up and cured him with my presence, so he gets a pass on not knowing what day I was arriving.

When we got back from the store, it was 5:00 aka kava time. We met up with his upstairs neighbor, Jamie from New Hampshire, and Jamie’s Papa John (no relation to the pizza papa) and we headed to my first Nakamal (kava bar). We were greeted by the chillest dog ever.

Moments later he bolted into action to defend his territory from an approaching dog.

It was time to start my kava education.

Lesson #1: You cannot eat before drinking kava. Have a big lunch around 1 and you eat dinner after kava.

Lesson #2: Kava is not alcohol. You don’t sip it. You chug a shell, wait 10-15 minutes and then do another. Chug, wait, repeat.

Lesson #3: You spit after you drink. I didn’t get this at first, but by the 3rd shell I understood. Kava leaves a nasty aftertaste.

Lesson #4: Wasemaot (pronounced wash-em-out). Basically a chaser and can be pretty much anything: soda, ice cream, sausage, yam, chips. Really whatever food or drink you have handy. At Nakamals they sell all different kinds of wasemaot. It is not free even if they don’t have price signs up. I just thought they were very generous bar owners, haha.

Lesson #5: Not all kava is made equal. Some kava is stronger than other kava. Some kava is cleaner. Some kava tastes better. It’s all about the preparation. Some kava is such shit that the effect lasts 2 days, which Matt claims is miserable and I believe it.

Cheers to my 2nd ever kava shell (there was nobody to take a picture of the 1st one because we were all drinking one).

We drank 2 shells at the Nakamal and then filled up a 1.5 liter plastic bottle and went back to Jamie’s apartment. We finished that plastic at Jamie’s, but he had another in the fridge. After a while, I suddenly realized how drunk I was.

Lesson #6: Kava drunk is not like alcohol drunk. To me it’s more like being really high. I would not have been okay in public that first night.

I stopped drinking and just sat quietly waiting to sober up some. So quiet, in fact, that at one point Jamie asked if what he was talking about was boring me. After an hour or 2 (I’m not really sure, time lost all meaning), I had sobered up some and we headed down to eat the pizza we had ordered earlier.

Lesson #7: The kava kicks back in when you eat after.

I had already been told this, but I was about to experience it. I ate half my pizza while talking to Matt and then thought about watching a movie before bed. Then the kava kicked. Apparently something to do with the digestion process triggers this effect. Suddenly I was more drunk than I had been all night, but this was like alcohol wastey faceness. I decided it was bedtime. I got up to go to the bathroom and could barely walk. Somehow I made it to the bathroom and back and then fell into bed and passed out.

I learned my lesson fast and from then on I ate less for dinner and immediately got in bed after.

I woke up around 2 am and felt like I had eaten a bowling ball. I had trouble going back to sleep for a while, which I guess is not uncommon after a night of kava drinking.

When we got ourselves together in the morning we headed to the downtown market. It was time to start trying new foods. I drank my first green coconut. Matt said it would help with my stomach, but I was unconvinced that anything was going to remove the bowling ball. Next Matt got me tuluk for breakfast. It was kind of like an unidentified meat burrito. It was good, but my stomach was not happy with the decision. We bought some fruit for the house and I met Matt’s mama, Rita, from Epau. She’s a Francophone and doesn’t speak much English.

We walked around town for a bit, got my phone sorted out and then went to Matt’s Fest ‘Nap committee meeting. It’s an annual, international music festival in Port Vila that Matt helps organize. We stayed about an hour and it was mostly in Bislama, so I found it riveting. The most exciting part was Aussie Vanessa who will be referred to as CashMoney$ from now on.

We left the meeting early and went to have Vietnamese Pho for lunch, whatever that is…….Oh, it’s soup, that should help my stomach. Finally the bowling ball was gone.

Next we met up with Matt’s friend, Nicky, and went to tour the Ekasup Kustom Village. They had left early and only a couple people were around, so Nicky gave a quick tour instead.

It was kava time when we got back to town and we went to a different Nakamal today. We drank kava for a while and I tried beef liver for a wasemaot. A little before 7 we went back to Matt’s to grab chairs and kava shells, got a plastic from White Light and went back to the field by the Nakamal for the Vanuatu vs. Venezuela under 20 World Cup Match. We couldn’t see the screen very well, so we only stayed a little while before heading back to Matt’s to drink more. When we left it was 1-0 Venezuela, but they went on to win 7-0. The Vanuatu team would return home a week later as heroes after losing 3-2 to Germany to bring their tournament record to 0-3. A late free kick goal by Vanuatu ended up eliminating Germany from the tournament because of goal differential. Vanuatu had never qualified for a World Cup tournament before.

I woke up and Matt had gone out and gotten some cheesy, ham, croissant deliciousness for breakfast. There was no bowling ball today.

We drove out to Melee and took a dingy ferry over to Hide Away Island and went snorkeling for a couple hours on the reef. I was there for sea turtles, but we would come up empty in that respect. We saw lots of fish, including Nemo hiding in his anemone home. We also saw a very deadly, black and white sea snake swimming in the corals. They are non-aggressive and have small mouths, but if you basically forced it to bite you, you’d die. Three months in Australia and this was my first wild, poisonous snake encounter. Way to go Vanuatu!!! I also swam through the world’s first underwater mailbox. They sell waterproof postcards at the shop on the island. Sorry family, I didn’t send any.

Hey, ladies.

We took the ferry back and ate lunch at Melee Beach Bar where I had my first Tusker beer, the local Vanuatu brew.

That afternoon we went with Latham for a tour of the museum. A Vanuatu local named Edgar did some sand drawing and played a couple songs on some local instruments.

As we were walking around and Latham was explaining some things, Edgar joined us to tell us about a couple things including the origin of bungy jumping. It doesn’t happen much anymore, but on one of the islands, they would build a big tower on a hill. They would churn up the ground on the downslope to soften it and the men would jump with a vine attached to their ankles. If done right, their head would just barely touch the ground. When done wrong they’d end up paralyzed or dead. It’s fucking crazy if you ask me and I love adrenaline stuff.

After the tour, it was kava time. We went to the Nakamal, had a few shells and filled a plastic. We went back to the field where the soccer game had been televised and watched the Namatan Film Festival that Nicky had entered. Matt had helped Nicky with his film. We watched the 8 short films and then went backstage for the prize announcements. Nicky’s film Cultural Exchange won first place!! It was in Bislama, so I had no idea what happened in it, but it got a lot of laughs. Once they had handed out the prizes, Matt performed a song with Krasrut Star, a local rapper. Mr. Wick is alive and well!!!

The rest of the night was spent back at Matt’s celebrating Nicky’s big win!!

I’m writing a separate post for our time in Epau, so there’s going to be a disconnect in the time space continuum here….We returned from Epau and went back to Matt’s for a nap. When we got up we went to Jill’s American Cafe for a late lunch. I had a breakfast burrito and we split an order of cheesy fries. My stomach was happy with some greasy, American food.

After lunch we went back to Matt’s, relaxed and played FIFA for a bit. The day was to be my only spell day (when they don’t drink kava, it’s called “spelling”). Literally, it was on Matt’s itinerary as my only day off from kava. Around 5, we went to a different Nakamal that also served beer. After 1 beer and some college reminiscing at the very dark and unsociable Nakamal, we decided to get beers at the store and drink at Matt’s until it was time to go out.

Not many people drink beer in Vanuatu because it is way more expensive than kava, so they pretty much only sell full cases and singles. We got 8 singles and went back to Matt’s to play FIFA and drink. Matt’s FIFA skills suffer when he drinks, but I hit a nice zone where I play better for a while, so I stole a few games from him. Latham came over and proceeded to kick my ass. I had left the beer buzz zone.

We went out to a club called Lava Lounge. We hungout with some of the people I had met already and I met a new rapper who told me that “Matt is the Bislama Shakespeare, but he has a shit singing voice.” I love backhanded compliments. Build them up before you break them down.

There was a twerk competition that night that I believe has damaged reputations on the island. They had a few heats and the winners of the heats advanced to the finals. Somehow the finals ended up being 2 guys and a girl that Matt knew named Jamie. Only one person on that stage had the necessary twerking “ass”ets (<–see what I did there), but in what can only be called the greatest injustice since Tom Brady’s Deflategate suspension, one of the guys won.

Fast forward past another day in Epau……

I slept in and when I woke up, Matt had made breakfast. There was bacon. Real bacon. Not rasher bacon. Crispy, delicious bacon. I played some FIFA and did some writing while Matt started preparing to make Tanna soup (curry with coconut milk, lobster, chicken and island cabbage). He showed me how to open a coconut with a machete and then scratch the pulp out with a coconut scratcher. He did the first half of the coconut and I did the other 1 1/2 coconuts. I was earning island badges left and right.

When the soup was done we brought it upstairs and ate lunch with Jamie. We saved the leftovers for our post-kava dinner.

We had a relaxing afternoon of FIFA and laundry until it was kava time. We went down to White Light with Jamie and had a couple shells before filling up a couple plastics and heading back to Jamie’s to drink the rest of the night.

The next morning we went to the Secret Gardens. Matt had filmed some of the footage for one of his music videos at the gardens. We took a tour led by a local from one of the other islands. We saw coconut crabs, but mostly I just got mauled by mosquitoes to the point where Matt was laughing at the visible bites on my legs. I have yet to show any signs of Dengue Fever, which is a miracle.

They also had a cage with 3 snakes. I wanted to pick one up. In many custom stories, snakes represent evil spirits so the guide was afraid to handle them, which meant I had to go in the cage and get the snake myself. The guide told me the little python liked to bite, so I grabbed the big diamond headed python closest to me. It squirmed a lot as I tried to get him off the hanging log he was on and I accidentally dropped him on his head. I got him out of the cage and he played nice for a couple pictures. All I kept thinking about was, Kaa, the snake from The Jungle Book and I was waiting for the snake to say something to me in that evil, hissing voice. I put him back in the cage and we moved on to the next part of the tour.

A few minutes later, the only other person on the tour, a lady from New Zealand, asked if we could go back so she could hold the snake. She explained to us that she just turned 65 and wanted to experience new things. We thought she wanted to experience the tour guide.

We went back to the snake cage and the guide told me to go get the snake. When I bent down to walk into the cage, the fucker had positioned himself on the log, facing the door and he tried to bite me in the face. Sorry lady, you’re on your own.

The Kiwi lady asked a million questions, so after some amusing pictures, we politely excused ourselves from the tour.

“Excuse me, sir!! I’d like to purchase your finest penis sheath. Bedazzle that shit so they know I’m a baller.”

We drove back into town and I had Indian food for the first time. Curry is delicious, but I wish it didn’t smell so awful.

Around kava time we went to the movies to see “Life.” The Vanuatu Cinema was surprisingly fancy. We went to the VIP section and sat in leather recliners. For the price of just 2 tickets, we rented out the whole theater. The movie was not very good, especially since Calvin…..ok, fine, I won’t ruin it.

After the movie, we went over to the house that Latham was staying at in Beverly Hills (nope, not kidding).

They chewed and prepared kava and we started drinking. Matt mentioned the movie and this guy Richard started a conversation about the possibility of alien life and some other stuff that was way too deep for kava drinking. After a couple hours, we left, picked up some kava at White Light and went up to Jamie’s to drink the rest of the night.

We woke up on my last full day in Vanuatu and Matt made breakfast. Our mission today was to find a live chicken at a market for me to kill, clean and roast for my going away party that night. We didn’t have any luck, so we went and got sushi for lunch and then went to the store and bought a bunch of meat.

We went back to Matt’s and played some FIFA. This was my last chance to end Matt’s undefeated run with Portugal. I had come close with Spain a few times, even leading 3-1, 4-3, and 5-4 in one game, but the older Spanish team got tired and Ronaldo tied the game in the last 2 minutes of regulation and again in the last minute of overtime before Matt put me away in penalty kicks.

Julen Lopetegui walked into the locker room that day and did his best Herb Brooks impression. “I’m sick and tired of hearing about how great Christiano Ronaldo and that Portugal team are. If we played them 10 times (in this case 12), they’d probably beat us 9 (or 11), but not today…..”

It’s been a great year for Ronaldo, but this black cloud will haunt him forever. Don’t be fooled. There was nothing friendly about this international match. I did a victory dance on Matt’s bed after the final horn. I felt like I had liberated Vanuatu from the wrath of Matt and Portugal.

It was time for party prep. We had bought firewood at the market earlier and had to split some of it into smaller pieces. We took machetes, struck them into the wood and then banged them through with another piece of wood. While splitting wood, the machete glanced off the edge of the wood and hit me on the wrist/hand that was holding the wood steady. I immediately thanked Matt for his dull blades. He thought I was joking about it being hard to split the wood. Ten minutes later he realized I had actually struck my own hand.

By the grace of the island gods, machete sharpening is not a skill that Matt has gotten very good at otherwise I would have been taking a trip to the hospital across the street. The dull machete barely even drew blood.

Matt started the fire while I picked and washed island cabbage from his garden because CashMoney$ is a vegetarian. We put the cabbage on the stove to boil, threw the grill grate on top of the fire and Matt left me to cook while he went and filled 5 plastics.

Jamie, Rob, Darren, Meto, Stan and CashMoney$ showed up and the party started. Nicky had disappeared after our last trip to Epau and Latham had gone back to his island. Rob had brought a 6th plastic and we all sat, drank kava and storied.

Rob and I drinkin a shell at Matt’s one night only, pop-up, Blue Light Nakamal.

When the 6 plastics were gone someone went and filled 3 more. I’m not sure what plastic we were on, maybe the 8th, but I started to see double and each new shell started to fight back a little harder while going down, so I decided I should stop drinking. We sat and talked until the kava was gone and then it was time for bed. You ain’t gotta go home, but you can’t stay here!!!

With our powers combined we are saying, “Peace, fucker.”

The aftermath.

The next day we had bacon burgers at Jill’s and then I went back to Matt’s to pack. We squeezed in a couple games of FIFA and he got his redemption with Portugal. I should have left well enough alone.

It was time to head to the airport. We said our goodbyes before security and I was back to life as a solo backpacker.

Matthew Thomas, it was great seeing you again!!! It had been far too long since we had had adventures together. Let’s not wait another 10 years. Massachusetts misses you!!! Thanks for everything, tawi bastard!!!

I took the bus from Airlie Beach to Townsville and then the ferry over to Magnetic Island. I got to the island around 1 pm and it started raining. It would rain the rest of the day. I got settled at the hostel and eventually went to the hostel bar with Eloi and Alex (Spaniards) from my Whitsundays trip. Around 11 I decided to call it a night.

The next morning I watched the Celtics game and hoped for the sun to come out. Eventually it did and I went for a hike from Nelly Bay to Arcadia. It took 30 minutes to walk to the start of the trail and then 2 1/2 hours to hike the trail.

The saddle of the mountain overlooks Horseshoe Bay on the other side of the island. The best views I got on the hike came when I ventured off the trail and climbed to the top of some boulders.

When I reached Arcadia, I walked down to the beach for a little bit and then walked an hour along the coast back to the hostel.

When I got back to the hostel, Ellys and Nicole had checked in and were sitting on the deck having drinks. I got showered and then joined them. The view from the hostel bar deck was terrible.

The view from the hostel bar deck.

We ate dinner, drank and waited for the bar games to start. Timo and Sebastian were staying at another hostel on the island, but came to drink at our hostel. The first bar game was a pool competition on the worst pool table I’ve ever played on. Sebastian won though, so he got 2 free jugs of beer.

A couple more games went by and then came musical chairs with a twist. If you didn’t get a chair, you could stay in the game by taking off an article of clothing. The first couple people to lose took off their shirts and stayed in the game. I lost the third round and went for the power move. I dropped my pants (I had boxers on). Everyone knew I meant business now. I won without having to take off anymore clothes because nobody else was willing to take off more than one item of clothing. The intimidation move had worked!!! The win earned us 2 more free jugs of beer and we partied until the bar closed at 1.

Silly, little island rental car.

The next day I relaxed on the deck until it was time to take the bus back to the ferry terminal. We took the ferry back to Townsville and then a bus to Cairns.

I checked into the Waterfront Backpackers hostel in Cairns at 7 pm. After I got settled, I got some dinner and then relaxed the rest of the night.

The next morning, I walked 2 miles to the Cairns Botanical Gardens. I explored the gardens for a little while and then headed back towards the hostel to find somewhere to eat lunch.

I spent the rest of the day relaxing and the next morning I met up with Alex (from Connecticut) at the casino to watch Game 7 of the Celtics-Wizards series. Somehow I got drunk off 4 beers (I think from exhaustion) and after the game I went back to the hostel and took a nap. The East Coast party had taken a toll and I needed some down time, I guess.

The next day I took a bus to Kuranda for the day. My first stop in Kuranda was the Australian Venom Zoo. I had officially given up my quest for a wild snake encounter.

The Inland Taipan. The most poisonous snake in Australia.

At the end of the zoo tour I got to hold an Olive Python.

My next stop was the Koala Gardens. They had lots of different animals: freshwater crocodiles, koalas, kangaroos and wallabies, a long nosed potoroo, ring tailed possums, bilbys, and my favorite, the quokkas.

Quokkas cuddling for warmth

I entered full tourist mode and paid $20 to hold a koala. How many chances am I gonna get, right?

Rocco livin the good life.

I left the gardens and walked around town exploring the shops for a while. I ended up buying a book on Aboriginal dreamtime and creation stories and then I headed to the railway station to take the scenic train back to Cairns.

The train rode along the edge of Barron Gorge and stopped at Barron Falls.

We continued on past the suburb of Camaranga and past Stony Creek Falls.

The scenic train ride took about an hour and 45 minutes to get back to Cairns.

I strolled around the city a bit that night, got some dinner and relaxed back at the hostel.

The next morning, I headed back to the casino to watch the Celtics game. When the Celtics ended they put on the Sox game so I stayed for the end of that too. I left the casino with a good buzz going and grabbed some beers at the bottle shop.

Timo and Sebastian came over to the hostel and we drank the beers. They hadn’t seen the nightly flying fox parade yet, so around sunset we went outside to watch the sky fill with giant bats.

The hostel was giving away free drinks at the Woodshed, so when the beers were gone we headed over to the bar. Most of the time the free drinks are watered down cocktails, but this was some kind of goon and fruit juice mixture.

At some point I started talking about wanting a tattoo to commemorate the trip, but I wasn’t sure what I wanted. I’m not 100% sure which one of them said it, but I think Sebastian suggested a kangaroo playing a didgeridoo. Being as drunk as I was at this point, I thought it was the best idea ever. We left the bar and headed straight for the tattoo parlor. Neither of them had ever gotten a tattoo before, but a couple hours later……

I think I’m pretending to play a didgeridoo 😂😂.

It’s been a couple weeks and I still think it’s hilarious and amazing.

After tattoos, we went to the party hostel, Gilligan’s, but the night gets really Fuzzy at that point.

The next morning I had to wake up early for my trip to Cape Tribulation. Getting out of bed was a struggle, but I was still laughing about the tattoo.

We stopped at Mt. Alexandra lookout and then went for a walk at Marrja in Daintree National Park.

The inside of a strangler fig

I was spending the night in Cape Trib so I got dropped off at PK’s Jungle Village around noon. I ate lunch and then booked jungle surfing for that afternoon and the jungle night walk for that night.

The jungle surfing was fun, but I’m not sure it was worth $100. The night walk was interesting, but the cool, rainy weather kept some of the better animals like snakes and tree kangaroos away. I did see my first huntsman spider and we also saw a Boyd’s Forest Dragon and some really big insects.

I got back to the hostel at 10 and the bar was already closed on a Friday night so I went back to my room and went to bed a little while later.

The next morning I walked outside and there was a peacock strolling through the hostel kitchen.

I wasn’t getting picked up until noon, so I had breakfast and went for a short walk to take pictures of signs that amused me.

Right before getting picked up, I saw some Ulysses butterflies on a flower bush near the hostel.

The bus picked me and a few other people up and we met up with the rest of the group at Cape Tribulation Beach where they were finishing lunch.

After a short stop at the beach, we headed to Daintree River Cruises to hopefully see some crocodiles. The sun was shining and it was warm out, so we were in luck. We saw lots of crocodiles, including Scarface, the 4.8 meter (almost 16 ft) long resident alpha male of the Daintree River.

On the cruise, I learned that a baby crocodiles gender is determined by the nest temperature while the egg is incubating.

After the river cruise we headed to Mossman Gorge for about an hour and then made one last stop at the Cairns (rock) towers on the way back to the city.

The rock towers are man made and get knocked down by strong surf sometimes, but people keep rebuilding them.

When I got back to Cairns I checked back into the hostel, got dinner and relaxed the rest of the night. The next day I flew to Brisbane and spent the night before flying to Vanuatu for my adventures with Matthew Thomas Hardwick!!!

There was not a single sober night involved in this, so I figured I’d write about it drunk. The Celtics just got their asses kicked and I still have almost half a day to get through.

So I got to Rainbow Beach around 7 pm. Checked into my room and met my roommates, a guy from Scotland, his girlfriend from England and Jolien from Germany. We went to bar trivia at the hostel. We were killin it. I got us 5 extra points by chugging a pitcher of beer with mussels in tomato sauce in the bottom. I only had to eat one mussel. Got 2 by accident, it was gross. Free pitcher of beer though. I guess we tanked the last round and lost by a point. Two teams tied for first and played rock, paper, strippers for first. Yea, RPS and take a piece of clothing off if you lose until you aren’t willing to take clothes off anymore. Turns out getting naked in a bar in Australia is fine.

There’s nothing to do in Rainbow Beach. Literally, only the beach and it’s not that great. I spent most of the next day waiting for our 4:30 Fraser Island safety briefing.

After the briefing, I ate my last Nimbin cookie for dinner, drank a few beers and then went to the Dingos bar for karaoke. I drank a pitcher and then once again hit the best high ever. I have found my perfect high. 7 beers and 1 Nimbin cookie. I sat there and laughed until I couldn’t handle it anymore and then went to bed.

Well, that was as far as I got with my drunk writing before I had the great idea to ask some of the people I had done these trips with to write me a paragraph about their experience. Seemed like a brilliant idea to get me out of writing and a handful of people were keen to it, but people are busy enjoying their travels and I’m falling behind on my blog. I ended up with a paragraph from Emilio about Fraser Island and one from Ellys and Nicole about the Whitsundays.  The drunk writing night ended pretty hilariously, but that will be a later post about Cairns.

Ok, so Fraser Island. Fraser Island is the world’s largest sand island and home to the purest breed of dingo in Australia. The car I was in was all girls; Stephanie, Lucy & Vicki (the Brits) and Jolien, Elisa, and Maggie (the Germans), so musically it was going to be a long 3 days. We took the ferry over around 10 am after a very thorough vehicle inspection (which apparently they only do once or twice a year) that included breathalyzers for all the drivers. Thankfully nobody had started the party yet. 

The Brits

When we got to the ferry departure point, there was a mystery ship that our guide, Graham, had never seen before and it was kinda creepy. We never really figured out what the story was with it as we were pretty far away from it, so maybe someone reading can figure it out.

I’m going with ghost pirate ship.

It was a short ferry ride over to the island, but on the way we saw a couple dolphins and a dugong (kinda like a manatee). I wasn’t quick enough to get pictures of any of them.

A lot of our day was spent driving down 75 Mile Beach and our first stop on the island was Lake Mckenzie. When we arrived at the lake, we were greeted by a sign literally warning people that dingoes will eat their kids. Hilarious. It was a beautiful lake and I decided my tattoo had healed enough, so I went swimming and laid out in the sun.

We stayed at the lake for a couple of hours before leaving for lunch. Eventually we made the drive to setup camp, get settled and start making dinner. It was time to get the party started. I had brought a 30 pack of Great Northern beer with me for the 2 night trip. I would run out around 9 or 10 pm the 2nd night and bum some goon off a few people. Everyone ate and then the drinking games started. How better to get to know people than King’s cup, “Never Have I Ever” and whatever else we ended up playing that night.

We got up early the next morning, which was a struggle for some of us. During the day our group separated into two smaller groups of 3 or 4 cars, each with a lead guide. Our group’s first stop today was The Champagne Pools. We spent about an hour there before we took a 10 minute walk up to Indian Head to see if we could look down and see any marine life. The water was too choppy so we couldn’t see anything. Another tour guide did find a big mud crab though.

After the walk back down from Indian Head, we made our way to the lunch spot for the day. There was a cafe and bottle shop. Thank the lord, because I needed a beer or 2 to chase the hangover. While we were there, we saw a monitor lizard that was about 3 feet long.

After lunch, we drove back to camp, grabbed some drinks and drove down to another lake to see some freshwater turtles. On the way back, we stopped at the Knifeblade Sandblow lookout.

At this point, it started to rain and we drove back to camp to start getting ready for dinner. The other group got back a little after us and some of them, well the guys in one car, had started the party earlier in the morning.

This is the party car (John, Emilio, Alex, Áine, Beth, Hilde, Annabel and Katie). It should have been my destiny, but for some reason I was denied by the Fraser Island gods.

The night was going to get weird. Like….goon weird. For those of you that don’t know, a goon sack is Australian backpacker slang for a cheap bag of wine. Nobody likes it, but so many people drink it and it messes you up. We’ll return to the goon later.

On our last day on Fraser, we stopped at the Maheno shipwreck, which we had driven past a couple times already. The SS Maheno was an ocean liner belonging to the Union Company of New Zealand that operated in the Tasman Sea, crossing between New Zealand and Australia from 1905 until 1935. She was also used as a hospital ship by the New Zealand Naval Forces during World War I. She was washed ashore on Fraser Island by a cyclone in 1935. During World War II, the Maheno wreckage was used as target practice by the Bundaberg Aviation Training School and the resulting holes can still be seen in the hull of the ship.

After a quick stop at the shipwreck, we went to Lake Wabby. It was about a 40 minute walk inland to the lake and once there we had an hour to enjoy it. Most of us laid out and took naps. Lake Wabby will eventually be swallowed up by the sandblow, which pushes toward it at about 1 meter per year. When we got back to the cars we went and had lunch.

Next we made our last stop for a float down Eli Creek. From there it was a long drive back down the beach to the ferry. We finally saw a couple dingoes though. They walked right up to the cars on the beach. They seem harmless to me.

Goodbye Fraser Island!! 😔

When we got back to Rainbow Beach, we got settled in our new rooms, relaxed for a bit and then met up at Dingos Bar for the after party.

As I said, Emilio wrote something a included his favorite picture from the trip. I find it amusing enough to post it even against my better judgement. I will explain it after.

“Highlight of my trip was definitely Fraser Island.. not for the scenery or activities but because of the people I met. And since then we’ve been meeting up every chance we get and it’s always been a good laugh 😁” – Emilio

It’s not what it looks like….I swear.

I told you, shit got goon weird. That’s Scottish John and this apparently is a game called “pass the goon.” The object is to take a mouthful of goon and pass it to the person next to you and then they pass it to the person next to them and so on and so forth. It’s just a silly drunk game that I wanted no part of because a man was on my left. I was just sitting there having a lovely chat with some people when I was forced into the game. His drunk, Scottish strength was too much for me. Somehow, the next day at least 4 people had a picture of it on their phone. Now, let’s all just forget it ever happened.

This should have been hanging in our camp.

The next day, I hung around the hostel and relaxed while I waited for my overnight bus to Airlie Beach. It was a very uncomfortable, 14 hour bus ride and all I wanted was a shower and a nap, but it was still too early to check in to the hostel when we got there. I checked into the travel agency for my Whitsundays sailing trip, got lunch and walked around town for a couple hours. There was a lot of damage in Airlie Beach from Cyclone Debbie a few weeks earlier. Some trees were uprooted, the lagoon was being repaired and many businesses were closed for repairs.

Finally, it was time to check in to Nomad’s and I took my nap and then a shower. I was still pretty beat from the overnight bus, so I mostly just rested up for my sailing trip the next day. I did go to Shed Bar, the hostel bar, for a jug of beer, but decided to go to bed around 10:30.

The next morning, I packed my boat bag, checked out of the hostel and went down to the beer garden at Magnum’s for breakfast. It turned out that Stefan and Judith, two of the Dutchies from my Outback tour, were in town so they came down and had a beer with me a little before lunch time.

I walked down to the marina with my 10 pack of beer and 4 liter bag of goon around 1:30 to board the Tongarra (again, I would run out the 2nd night, but Ellys and Nicole shared their goon with me). We boarded around 2:45 and after a few safety things, we were off!!!

We sailed for 3 1/2 hours before dropping anchor for the night just off the coast of Whitsunday Island. Our deckhand, Kane, and captain, Mick, made fish for dinner while we all drank and got to know each other before going to bed around midnight.

I woke up at 6 am and while Kane setup breakfast and everyone else slept, I jumped off the back of the boat for a swim. It was warmer in the water than outside. The rest of the boat woke up to the sound of “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” by Israel Kamakawiwo’ole. It was just like the end scene from 50 First Dates, but instead of Alaska, we were in the Whitsunday Islands in tropical Queensland, Australia. It was magical!!!

After brekky, we took the dingy over to the island and walked up to a lookout over Whitehaven Beach on the other side of the island. Whitehaven Beach is ranked the #1 beach in Australia and one of the top 5 beaches in the world. It has been used in the filming of Pirates of the Caribbean and Fool’s Gold, as well as other movies I’m sure. We took some pictures and headed down to the beach for a couple hours.

Here I am making love to the camera…really workin it….givin Mick everything I got. I could have been a model, no?

The weather wasn’t great, but we made the most of our time on Whitehaven. Soon it was time to head back to the boat for lunch, but I went for a bit of a climb and got a few more pictures before we left.

We ate lunch, pulled the anchor up and headed for Manta Ray Bay to do some snorkeling. We saw lots of fish, but the water was still too murky from the cyclone to see down to the corals.

My first Fosters!!

This was a lighthouse, but it was washed away by Debbie.

Snorkeling ended and we spent about a half hour jumping off the top of the boat into the water. I would be a bit sore by the end.

Oldest person on the boat doing backflips off it. Seriously….the oldest person on the boat including the crew.

It was time to sail to the spot where we would spend the night, but first it was time to start the party!!! I “beer bonged” 2 beers out of a didgeridoo!! Absolutely one of the highlights of my drinking career!! There’s a video, but didn’t pay to be able to load videos on the blog. We sailed, we drank, we danced the night away!!

A beautiful sunset on the water.

We woke up the next morning, had breakfast and then it was time to sail back to Airlie Beach. It took about 4 hours to get back because we were dealing with 8-10 foot seas. A couple people got sick and everyone got soaked. I stood at the front of the boat loving every minute, but mostly I was scared that if I tried to join everyone at the back, I’d get thrown overboard.

We got back to Airlie at 12:15 and I went to KC’s Bar and Grill and had the Roo and Croc Medley for lunch. Kangaroo steaks and crocodile tail. It was delicious!! When I check back into the hostel it was nap time. Living on the water is exhausting, haha!! Eventually about half our group met at Shed Bar for the after party. We drank there until about 11 and then went to Boom Nightclub. I was still pretty tired, so I called it a night around 12:30. Boom is open until 5 am.

I was hungry, so I went to McDonald’s and as soon as I looked up at the menu, I felt like I was back on the boat. Food wasn’t going to happen. It took a couple days before the swaying sensation stopped randomly popping up.

I spent my last day in Airlie watching the Celtics, doing laundry, relaxing and packing up for my next adventure to Magnetic Island.

“Well our Whitsundays trip is one of mine and Ellys’s highlights of our East Coast travels! Finally found a GREAT group of people who knew how to socialise, have some fun and of course enjoyed a good drink! Despite our miserable weather we had, we had a bloody good time! Whitehaven Beach was definitely a favourite despite the constant moans we were cold and wanted to get back to the boat. Our time wasting skills went down a treat making half like pyramids and of course spelling out the good old GOON! The evenings of course were another highlight when everyone’s ready for a good old drink! From heart to heart conversations, playing games, to Greg joining our FaceTime to our parents!
Thanks for your company along the way Greg, it’s been a pleasure! 😊🍷”- Nicole and Ellys

The O’s didn’t leave it all on the beach that day.

Don’t mind their funny spelling or whatever “our time wasting skills went down a treat” means. They are silly Brits. Also, their parents love me. I assume they talk about me like a son now.

I have much more to tell of my East Coast journeys and I’ll do my best to catch up, but tomorrow morning I am off to see my dear friend, Matthew Thomas Hardwick in Vanuatu!!! I’m very excited to have adventures with him for the first time in 10 years.

My flight from Christchurch to Sydney was scheduled for 6:15 am, which meant I needed to be at the airport for 4:15, which meant the airport shuttle was picking me up at 3:15, which meant I got up at 2:45 am. Needless to say, I didn’t get much sleep, but I did sleep for most of the 3 hour flight.

The airport shuttle dropped me off at the Jolly Swagman hostel in the Kings Cross neighborhood of Sydney. I went to check in and when the receptionist asked for my voucher, I reached for my day pack and it wasn’t there. Oh shit!!! I went out to the street and it wasn’t there either. All of my trip vouchers (valued at $1,700), plus my camera, journal and travel guides were in there. I called the shuttle company and after a few minutes they called me back and told me the driver had it. Phew!! That’s what happens when you have to be up at 2:45 in the morning for a flight.

I only had one night in Sydney and I spent it getting everything ready and then I walked down to Circular Quay. It was ANZAC Day, but I had missed the parade. All I got to see was a shitload of fully dressed military personnel drinking in bars all around the city.

The next day, I hung around the hostel waiting until it was time to leave for my overnight bus to Byron Bay. It was a 13 hour bus ride and I got into Byron Bay at about 8:30 am, but had to wait until 1 to check in to the hostel. I watched the Celtics game while I waited. Byron is a surf town and other than the beach and the bars there isn’t much going on.

What I hadn’t considered in Christchurch was the piss poor timing of my tattoo. I was supposed to wait 2 weeks before exposing it to the sun or soaking in water, so the beach was out. This would be a problem over the course of the next few towns. Eventually, I got a case of beer and sat around chatting all night with some of the other backpackers.

The next day, I took a day trip to Nimbin, the weed capital of Australia. Our bus driver encouraged us to drink alcohol and smoke weed all day. In fact, we stopped at the liquor store at like 10:30 before we ever got to Nimbin. I was rockin a pretty serious hangover, so it seemed like a hair of the dog kind of day. I grabbed a 6 pack and drank 2 on the way to Nimbin.

When we got to Nimbin, I went to a hotel and ordered food and a beer. Nimbin was a trip, not literally, but it could have been. We were there for an hour and a half and I got asked 5 times on the street if I wanted to buy weed. Eventually, I did go into an art gallery and buy a few pot cookies. I took half of one right before we got back on the bus. I had a beer on the way to our dinner spot and then ate the other half cookie when we got there. I drank my other beers and pretty much landed in the best high of my life.

We got back to Byron Bay at 6 and I accidentally took a 2 hour nap. When I woke up, I went and got some food and then ended up going back to bed at 9:45, hahaha.

The next day I took the bus to Noosa and checked into the Nomad’s hostel. Most Nomad’s have a reputation as being a party hostel and this one was no different. I needed a couple nights off after Byron though, so I relaxed both nights there. During the one full day that I spent there, I walked an hour down to Noosa National Park and did a 3 hour coastal walk. The beaches were beautiful, but I still wasn’t able to fully enjoy them.

After the walk, I took a stroll down the main street of Noosa andd then headed back to the hostel. That night I ate my 2nd cookie, but without the added alcohol, it didn’t do much for me. The next day I would be taking the bus to Rainbow Beach and it turned out this would be my last relaxing night for a week.

My last week in New Zealand was mostly spent in Christchurch, but I stopped at Lake Tekapo for a night. In Tekapo, I stayed in a 5 person tent. It was basically a giant teepee.

When I woke up in the morning, it was 4° C (39° F) and I was freezing. What happened to summer?

My bus to Christchurch wasn’t until 4 pm, so I decided to take a hike up to the top of Mt. John. It wasn’t a particularly difficult hike, but it took about 3 hours roundtrip.

At the summit of Mt. John is the Mt. John Observatory. In June 2012 an area of 1,700 square miles around the observatory was declared as the Aoraki Mackenzie International Dark Sky Reserve by the International Dark Sky Association. It is only one of 4 such reserves in the world and the area has a Bortle Scale rating of 2. The scale is 1-9 with 1 being the darkest night sky in the world. There’s a short walk from the observatory on the Northern summit to a special stargazing bench on the Southern summit.

After the hike, I was off to my last stop in New Zealand. I had 5 nights booked at the Jailhouse Accomodation. 5 nights sleeping in a jail cell sounded interesting. The jail was built in 1874, closed in 1999 and was opened as a hostel in 2006.

It was around 8 pm by the time I got settled, so I got some dinner and spent the night at the hostel. The next day, I walked down to the Canterbury Museum and took a shuttle bus to the International Antarctic Centre. The IAC is home to the New Zealand, United States and Italian Antarctic programs.

I spent a little extra money and got the Penguins Backstage Pass. The Antarctic Centre takes in rescued blue penguins that are no longer capable of living in the wild. We weren’t allowed to touch the penguins, but we did get to go into the enclosure. We also went down to the office area where they bring penguins to monitor them. One of the penguins had been acting strange so he was down in the room.

After the penguin tour, I walked through some of the other exhibits before going on a Hagglund ride. Hagglunds are the track vehicles used by the scientists in Antarctica. The ride was about 10 minutes through a course designed to demonstrate the vehicle’s capabilities.

Our Hagglund

When the ride was over, I saw the rest of the exhibits including the Antarctic Snow and Ice Experience where the air temperature is -8° C (19 ° F). Every hour they simulate a storm with wind chills up to -18° C (-3° F). They give you a jacket when you enter, but I was still wearing shorts and the storm got a bit chilly (even for me).

It’s really friggin cold in Antarctica.

I took the shuttle back to the museum and walked the 30 minutes back to the hostel. Christchurch was devastated by an earthquake in 2011 and much of the city is still under construction.

After I made dinner, I grabbed a case of beer and hungout at the hostel for a while. Later that night, I went to Sullivan’s where they advertise the “world’s largest glass of beer.” Don’t tempt me with a good time. Turns out the glass is like 9 liters and they don’t sell it. They got my hopes up and then crushed my dream of drinking the biggest beer in the world.

I spent much of the next day hungover and watching the Bruins and Celtics playoff games. After the games ended though, I went and found the tattoo parlor that I would be getting my pohutukawa tree done at. Then I went to Peter Pans and spent a couple hours booking my East Coast Australia trip.

The next day I walked back to the museum and took a shuttle to the Christchurch Gondola. The gondola ride to the top of the mountain takes 10 minutes. At the top is a gift shop, cafe, observation deck, a short “ride,” and great views overlooking the city. The Time Tunnel ride was a 6 minute ride about the history of Canterbury. After wandering around the mountain and the shop, I took the gondola back down the mountain.

When I got back to the museum, I decided to take an Uber to the Willowbrook Wildlife Reserve. They had lots of animals, but they also had a nocturnal kiwi house and I saw 2 kiwis!!!

Doin monkey things.

Lemurs are awesome!!

Kiwi!!!!!!!!!

My last day in Christchurch was spent at Zealand Tattoo. I got a pohutukawa tree on my ribs. For anyone that missed my Cape Reinga post, the Maori people believe that when they die, their spirits travel across the land to Cape Reinga. At Cape Reinga, the spirit passes down the roots of an 800 year old pohutukawa tree into the ocean. The spirit then swims to Three Kings Islands, where they climb to the highest point, Ohaua, and look back to the mainland to bid their final farewell before returning to Hawaiiki-A-Nui, the land of their ancestors. I wanted something to symbolize my time in New Zealand and I think this is a really cool belief about the afterlife.

The rest of my day was spent packing and relaxing. The airport shuttle was picking me up at 3:15 am. 6 am international flights are the best!!!!

A couple days after leaving New Zealand, I came across an article about the Southern Lights that had been on display a couple nights while I was in Christchurch. I had no idea it was happening and I was devastated to know I missed an opportunity to cross that off my bucket list. I stole some pictures from the article. They were taken with much nicer cameras than mine and by much more talented photographers. I assume they were both long exposure shots and the one with the Milky Way is probably 2 photos spliced together, but they make me want to take photography lessons.

Just saying “Hi” and letting you all know that I’m alive and well. I know I haven’t written in a week, and I’m a few weeks behind on trip updates now, but I needed a break. I’m tired. I haven’t spent more than 5 days in one place since Melbourne in February. Most places have been 2 days, 3 tops.

I’m going to spend the next 3 days hanging with the dingoes on Fraser Island and relaxing in a little slice of paradise. Hopefully it will recharge my batteries and I’ll get a few posts done when I get back from the island.

Cheers!!!

Queenstown is known as “the adventure capital of New Zealand,” though I’m not sure exactly why because they have the same adventure options as like 3 other places in New Zealand. The only thing I was considering doing was bungy jumping, but by the time I decided to spend the money, it was fully booked for the time I would be in town. Other than adventure sports, Queenstown is a big party town. Lots of bars and lots of drink specials!! I was in town for 2 nights and had to get up early for bus trips both days, so I drank a total of 6 beers, which was actually 1 more drink than I’d had my entire time in new Zealand to that point.

I didn’t arrive in Queenstown until just before sunset and after checking in to the hostel, I went down to the lake, found somewhere to eat and wandered around town.

After exploring for a while, I drank those 6 beers and called it a night. The next morning, I was up early to catch the bus for my day trip to Milford Sound. If we could have driven across the Southern Alps, it would have taken about 30 minutes to get to Milford Sound. You have to go down and around the mountains to get there though, so it took 4 1/2 hours. Along the way we stopped at the Mirror Lakes.

I won’t say much about Milford Sound because the pictures say plenty. Milford is actually a fjord, not a sound. It stretches 15 km inland from the Tasman Sea. Mitre Peak rises up over a mile from the waters. They get over 250 inches of rain during the year (though I got a beautiful day) and the rains create hundreds of temporary waterfalls throughout the sound. It is the most famous tourist location in New Zealand and was once called the “Eighth Wonder of the World” by Rudyard Kipling. I spent 9 hours on a bus for a 2 hour ferry ride through the sound and it was worth it.

Mitre Peak is the tallest of the two mountains in the center.

Waterfall rainbow!

I’ll chase waterfalls all day long, even if TLC tells me not to.

Get out of my shot before I discount double check you over the railing, Aaron Rodgers!!

So yea, I took a lot of pictures at Milford Sound. Milford Sound is a must see if you’re ever in New Zealand!!! Back on the bus for the 4 1/2 hour trip back to Queenstown, but still managed to catch another beautiful sunset.

We got back around 7 and I headed out for dinner and after dinner I stopped at the candy store. I am addicted to Starburst Snakes. They are just gummy snakes, but I can’t get enough of them. On the way out, I tried a couple pieces of fudge. On of them was called “farts.” I wasn’t going to not try fart fudge. It was kinda sour with mini M & M’s on top and it was delicious!! The next morning I was off to my next stop, Lake Tekapo.

*Though I still have a couple New Zealand posts to write, today marks the end of my time in New Zealand. I am sad to leave. Even though the weather didn’t always cooperate, New Zealand is so incredibly beautiful. I’m flying from Christchurch back to Sydney today and tomorrow I begin my 20 day tour up the East Coast to Cairns. The main attraction on the upcoming tour is a 3 day, 2 night Whitsundays cruise and snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef!! I’m also hoping to get on a surfboard.

On the bus ride from Punakaiki to Wanaka we stopped to see Thunder Creek Falls and Lake Hawea.

Lake Hawea was beautiful, but just around the corner was Lake Wanaka and it was love at first sight!!! If I were to ever move to this side of the world, it would be to Wanaka.

Water sports, hiking, mountain climbing, skydiving in spring, summer and fall and skiing in the winter. I want to pick Wanaka up and drop it between Cape Cod and Boston and retire there.

I spent sunset down by the lake before heading back to the hostel to rest up for my morning hike.

I got up early the next morning to watch the Bruins shit themselves in the 3rd period of game 2. I headed out at 10:30 to go for my hike to the top of Roy’s Peak. The receptionist at the hostel told me it would take about 45 minutes to walk to the carpark where the track started. It ended up being 6 km and taking an hour and a half. I stopped for a few minutes to take pictures at the Rippon Vineyard on the lake and also spent some time with a couple relatives I met along the way.

It was noon by the time I got to the start of the summit trail and the hike was supposed to take 5-6 hrs. Plus I was going to have to walk about an hr and a half back to town. Time was going to be a factor unless I wanted to walk back to town in the dark. I got maybe 2/3 of the way up the mountain and decided it was time to turn back. I still go some great views, but there’s always a different feeling at the top.

I mentioned skydiving earlier. Well, I got up close and personal with some skydivers on my hike. I only got a picture of a guy in the 2nd grouping, but the first guy to go past me was about 2 feet off the ground and 10 feet away from me. I was facing the lake taking pictures when he flew on by and I was quite surprised by him dropping in on me.

Most of the Roys Peak track is on private farmland. There are about 4.5 million people in New Zealand and about 33 million sheep. This is the only picture of sheep I have taken the entire time I’ve been here.

I got back to town just before sunset and found a burger joint to go to for dinner. I ordered cajun fries and while eating them I did something that I am not proud of…….I dipped them in the homemade aoili that came with them. I’ve been trying to justify my actions by saying there was just so much cajun seasoning on them that I needed something to cut into the powdery texture. While this may be true, it does not excuse my sickening actions. What kind of monster have I become? There’s a fine line between dipping fries in mayo and becoming a serial killer. I can only hope it’s not too late for me to turn back. 

Fall has arrived in New Zealand and this seems like a beautiful spot to hide the bodies.

The next stop on my trip was Nelson, which I had never really planned on going to, but it seemed to be the closest I could get to Abel Tasman National Park by coach. I checked into The Prince Albert Bar and Backpackers, which ended up being the nicest hostel I’ve stayed in my entire trip so far.

The bar had an awesome patio with strands of their own hops growing overhead and the hostel had a nice, big courtyard with hammocks.

When I got settled, I found out that one of the jewelers in town, Jens Hansen, was where the rings for The Lord of the Rings movies were crafted. I rushed over and got there about 30 minutes before close. When one of the sales associates asked if I needed any help, I said, “I’m not going to pretend I can afford anything in here. I just came to see the rings.” There was “one ring to rule them all,” but they made 40 of them for the movies. They were all sized and weighted differently for certain scenes. I got to hold the big ring that they used in the opening credits of the movies.

After the jewelery store, I walked around town and saw Winston’s Church Hill.

Oh, yea, I’m kidding. It’s just called Church Hill.

The next day, I was up early to catch a sea shuttle to Abel Tasman National Park. The park’s coastline is only accessible by boat as there are no roads in and out. Abel Tasman is the smallest national park in all of New Zealand.

The 2 1/2 hour ferry ride took me as far up the coastline as boats are permitted to sail before turning back and dropping me at Medland Beach. Along the way we cruised past Split Apple Rock and then Adele Island to see the colony of New Zealand fur seals.

Interesting story about these dying pine trees…..

Pine trees aren’t native to New Zealand. About 100 years ago, the smart guys over at Harvard decided to bring them over here to see how they’d fair. Well, they do really, really, really well. So well that forestry is one of the biggest industries in New Zealand. Problem is they don’t really want them invading the national parks, so the pines in this picture are being intentionally poisoned. The ones near walking tracks or easily accessible areas are cut down. Ones like these that are harder to get to…..they shoot them from a helicopter with poison bullets. How cool is that?

“What do you do for a living?”

“I fly around in a helicopter and shoot trees with poison bullets.”

Where did I go wrong in life? (Rhetorical question)

The walk from Medland Beach to Anchorage Beach was 11.3 km and took about 3 1/2 hours. The trail was mostly through the forest, but popped out on a few beaches too. During the walk I saw a weka, which is a flightless bird, not that unlike a kiwi and it had me fooled for a bit. I had hoped it was a type of kiwi that I wasn’t familiar with since there are 5 different species.

Weka (definitely not a kiwi)

When I got to Anchorage Beach, I had about 45 minutes to kill before the boat arrived. A stingray occupied 15-20 minutes of that time. I wasn’t sure if I should go play with it or avenge Steve Irwin. They are pretty gentle for the most part, but if they get startled or feel threatened, they may attack. The barbs on their stinger inject a poison that can cause paralysis and death in humans. The stinger itself can also kill you if it hits you in the right spot (RIP Crocodile Hunter).

Crikey, she’s a big girl!!! It got pretty close to shore, but when I got in the water, it swam further out to go around me.

The boat eventually came and we headed back, but on the ride back we saw a dolphin!! They are usually around earlier in the year and the guide said it had been about 2 months since they had seen one, so we got lucky. It didn’t surface much and it was hard to get a picture, but I managed to get one of it’s fin above water.

The next day I took the bus from Nelson to Punakaiki. I got dropped off at the wrong bus stop and had to walk 2 miles to the hostel with all my stuff (between my backpack and my daypack, that’s about 55 lbs strapped to my back). By the time I got to the hostel, I was soaked in sweat and rain. I checked in, got settled, showered and rested a bit.

A little before sunset, I headed almost all the way back to where I had been dropped off to go see the Pancake Rocks and Blowholes. By the time I got there, it was almost dark and I couldn’t really see much. I got a few nice sunset pictures during the walk though.

The walk back to the hostel was pitch black except for the flashlight on my phone. There were no street lights, only a couple cars that passed and then it started to pour about 15 minutes before I got back.

The next day, Lisa (a German girl from my room) and I got dropped off at the Pancake Rocks Information Center at about 11 am. Our bus wasn’t until 12:35, so we dropped our backpacks and walked the loop path to the Pancake Rocks.

These aren’t the pancakes I was looking for.

The whole walk took less than an hour, so we grabbed some lunch at the cafe, which killed the rest of the time until the bus arrived.

I got to Franz Josef around 5 pm and checked into the hostel. It was raining, but I explored the small town before heading back to the hostel for the night.

The Franz Josef Police Station is adorable.

The hostel has a DVD collection and a nice, big flatscreen TV, but everyone was watching The Lord of the Rings. I think it’s mandatory in New Zealand. I’m not kidding. I wrote that in my journal and then 30 minutes later, these 2 German girls (there are so many Germans) that checked into my room today asked if I minded if they watched a movie with the sound on. I said no problem and asked if they were watching anything good. I should have already known the answer. They are watching it in German. I’ve managed to avoid watching it even though I’ve seen it on at most of the hostels I’ve been to here. Thank god for streaming movie websites.

I got up this morning and tried to beat the rain to the Franz Josef Glacier. It was an hour walk to the carpark and then a 1 1/2 hour roundtrip walk to the glacier viewing platform.

I got some good pictures on the walk and managed to beat the heavier rain there, but not back. More importantly, I beat the clouds that crept in and covered the mountain tops just after I headed back from the glacier.

At the glacier platform, I ignored the ropes, warning signs and article about 2 dead hikers to try and get closer to the glacier. On Fox Glacier, you are required to have a guide, but not on Franz Josef. Unfortunately, I ended up turning back before I got to the glacier when I was faced with about a 20 ft drop down a 70° slope. I only had my sneakers on, so footing became an issue. I was also worried about the possibility of flash flooding due to the weather the past few days and the forecast for today.

I spent the rest of the day writing, doing laundry, packing and staying dry. Tomorrow morning I’m off to Wanaka for 2 days and then Queenstown, “the adventure capitol of New Zealand” for 2 days.

This is as close as I’ve gotten to kiwis so far….

My last stop on the North Island was New Zealand’s capitol city of Wellington. How much of a city can you really see in a day and a half? Not much. I got into the city late in the afternoon and did some grocery shopping and wandered around a bit, but it was still raining so mostly I stayed in the hostel.

I woke up the next morning and saw this strange site out the window. It was the sky….it had turned blue overnight and there was this giant, glowing orb floating in the middle. What kind of sorceror has such powers?

Time to take advantage of the weather and cram as much as I can into a day. I headed off to the Botanical Gardens. I don’t know if it’s the landscaper in me that heads to the gardens first or if it’s because they are free. I’d like to think work has nothing to do with it. Speaking of work, those poor assholes are back at it. See you in July, fellas!!!

In the gardens, there was a “Sundial of Human Involvement.” The sundial uses a person’s shadow to tell the time of day. The sign said the hour indicators were moved twice a year to account for daylight savings, but the sundial was off an hour so……..

There was also a “tree house” in the gardens and inside was a history of New Zealand’s dinosaurs and some fossils. It was really random.

After the gardens, I walked to Parliament House. I had other stuff to do so I just buzzed by for pictures and I didn’t go inside for the tour. The “Beehive” houses the Executive Wing of the New Zealand government, including the Prime Minister’s office.

The Beehive

From Parliament, I ran a couple errands, grabbed some lunch and then headed to the Museum of New Zealand Te Papa Tongarewa. I saw my first kiwis at the museum. They were dead and stuffed, but it still counts. They’re a lot bigger than I thought they were.

I also saw one of the aliens from the movie Independence Day. Apparently, the New Zealand government is trying to pass it off as a giant squid, but I know the truth.

According to the sign, this is the only actual specimen of a giant squid on display in the entire world.

The museum had this awesome exhibit about New Zealand’s involvement at Gallipoli in World War I. Unfortunately, the exhibit was really cramped and crowded and people were moving really slow, so my natural reaction was to fly through it and get the hell out of there.

There was also an earthquake exhibit, which talked about the devastation from a large earthquake. There was a small house set up with a short video and during the video the whole house shook to replicate the effects of a 5.0 aftershock. Little did I know I’d get the real thing a few days later!!

At this point, I got distracted by a couple people messaging me and stopped really paying attention, kinda got lost in the museum and eventually found my way to the exit.

That was enough excitement for one day. I had to get back and do some stuff to get ready to leave for the South Island in the morning.

The next morning I took an Uber to the ferry terminal and boarded for my 3 hour ride from Wellington to Picton. The sun had disappeared again, but at least it wasn’t raining. I got to the hostel around 1, went grocery shopping and spent about 4 hours trying to book and plan my South Island adventure. Planning is not my favorite part. I like to just do stuff, but without a car, travel plans are kind of necessary.

That night as I relaxed on the couch, I felt my first ever earthquake or at least I was pretty sure it was an earthquake. I only felt the couch shake, so the next day I checked the New Zealand earthquake website.

Woohoo!!!! I was right!!! I love being right!!!

The sun made a triumphant return the next day, so I went for a 3 hr hike from Victoria’s Domain to The Snout along the Marlborough Sounds. The walk turned into a 5 hr walk because it took me an hr to walk to the start of the trail from the hostel. It was worth it though!!

Later that day, I walked down to the marina to explore the town some and watch the sunset. The sun set on the other side of the mountains, so…….😝. Oh well, pretty sure nothing is ever going to beat the Kata Tjutu sunset anyway.

That’s some Lion King shit right there.

Sorry, back to the harbor in Picton.

After sunset, I went back for a relaxing night at the hostel. Late that night, I felt my 2nd earthquake!! I was sitting on a dining room chair for this one and felt it shake the floor and the wall next to me!! I went back to the website to check it out.

This one was slightly bigger, but also closer to Picton. It turns out that over the course of my 2 days in Picton, there were 23 earthquakes recorded in New Zealand, but only 2 were close enough or big enough for me to feel (that’s what she said).

Today, I was off to Nelson for 2 days. Tomorrow will probably be my only day without a bus ride for the next week or so, maybe until I get to Milford Sound, which is supposed to be way more impressive than Marlborough Sounds. I just hope the weather cooperates for my ferry tour when I get there. We’ve been getting lots of rain from cyclones that have hit Australia and now Vanuatu. As long as I avoid getting trapped in any town longer than I plan because of flooding, I’ll be happy.